She can’t bear it anymore.

Ms Acopio, 52, was allegedly sexually assaulted by three men in separate incidents in Lake Macquarie more than 20 years ago.

She’s decided to speak publicly about being a rape victim to raise awareness and help others who have been through a similar ordeal.

“It has affected my whole life enormously,” Ms Acopio, of Maryland in Newcastle’s west, said.

“I suffered extreme depression, severe anxiety, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and suicidal thoughts.”

Many times, she would “curl up like a ball in my room, crying”.

Ms Acopio alleged the attackers used power and control to rape her.

Of one of the attackers, Ms Acopio alleged: “I was basically his sex slave”.

The other two alleged rapes were single incidents.

Ms Acopio is writing a book about her experiences, titled I Did Not Give Them My Consent.

“It’s a story of survival. I did not use any drugs or alcohol. I had to be brave and strong,” she said.

“I can’t be silenced anymore. I want to have my voice out there and speak up.”

She moved to Australia from the Philippines in 1989.

She believes her Filipino background and “being an Asian girl” were factors in the sex crimes allegedly perpetrated against her.

“I had no resources and I didn’t know where to go for help.”

She has since had help from psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers and Lifeline.

“I had to be brave and strong,” she said. “I went for a healing retreat at Heal for Life Foundation. I did some meditations and prayers. I didn’t like antidepressant tablets, as it made me very tired and I lacked energy.”

Ms Acopio urged other victims to “seek some help and counselling”.

“Take time to heal. You are not alone and there’s always hope in life,” she said.

She urged victims to never give up and “take extra care of yourselves”.

As for the predators who allegedly raped her, she hopes they feel guilt and shame.

“May your crimes haunt you for the rest of your lives because you deserve it,” she said.

“What you did to me was wrong. You all took advantage of me, but you no longer have any power and control over me.

“I hope you rot in hell.”

For years, Ms Acopio said she “suffered in silence”.

“I could not tell anyone. I was too embarrassed and ashamed of what had happened to me.”

In Filipino culture, she said, “we never mention or talk about rape or sexual assault”.

Maitland MP Jenny Aitchison revealed in May that she was a sexual assault victim.

Her story prompted Ms Acopio to come forward.

Ms Aitchison, who is shadow minister for the prevention of domestic violence and sexual assault, said it was sad that “people in Bec’s community told her not to say anything” about the crimes against her.

“She’s now living with the consequences of that silence,” Ms Aitchison said.

When victims tell friends and/or family about a sexual assault, “the best thing they can do is believe them straight away and give support”, she said.

“It makes it so much easier for the victim to go forward to police.”

Ms Acopio said it took her more than 20 years to “start feeling normal and speaking up”.

As such, she did not report the matter to police until last year.

Lake Macquarie Police investigated Ms Acopio’s allegations, but were unable to press charges because of insufficient evidence.

Detective Senior Sergeant and acting crime manager Paul Laksa said it was possible to prosecute historic sexual assault cases.

However, a lack of independent corroboration impeded Ms Acobio’s case.

The lack of a crime scene also makes such cases difficult to prosecute.

Detective Senior Sergeant Laksa urged victims to report sex crimes to police as soon as possible.

“It makes so much difference if they come to us early in the piece, so we can collect evidence,” he said.

“But if they come later, we’ll do the best we can.”

He said victims have control of the investigation and “we will work with them”.

Ms Acopio joined police in urging victims to report sexual assaults.

“The sooner, the better,” she said.

Bianca Fileborn, lecturer in criminology at University of NSW, said historical sexual assault cases were “difficult for police to prosecute and take to trial”.

“It’s not to say these cases can’t be prosecuted,” Dr Fileborn said.

“But there are additional challenges to gather a level of evidence that provides a strong enough case to take to court.”

Newcastle-based criminal lawyer John Anthony said he had seen cases prosecuted that “go back in excess of 35 to 40 years”.

“The delay [in reporting such a crime] is not the big issue it used to be in sexual assault cases,” he said.

“The issue would be corroboration.”

Newcastle Law Society president Gary Fox said the standard of proof in criminal offences was “the relatively high standard of beyond reasonable doubt”.

“Police will inform victims about whether alleged offences are able to be proved to that high standard,” Mr Fox said.

The NSW government is working on the NSW Sexual Assault Strategy. 

The Herald, Newcastle